Culinary school is $$$, people! So, I’m trying to make ends meet and have gotten a server job at Restaurant X. Working 7 days a week, some 16 hour days, working for an abusive little man. Apparently, I can’t do anything right, cannot move fast enough, that I am incompetent. “You always look nervous.” Well, yeah, you’d be nervous, too, if some mini pitbull of a man was barking down your neck and threatening to eat your ears off.
Talk about soul crushing.
I’m super exhausted but want to do the running-man dance. I’m so excited for the future! It’s so hard to keep a positive attitude. I feel like I’m having mood swings every other minute: tired, happy, pissed off, elated, zZzZzZzZzZ. But I am practicing yoga as much as possible, trying to keep a positive attitude about life. I just got a bonus at day job, that makes me feel awesome! I also feel like I am living a double-life: one cushy cubicle day job, one grueling night job.
Lesson: if you want something really bad, go and get it. If you can make it in New York, you can make it anywhere.
Remember how I mentioned that I was applying to culinary schools? Well….I received my acceptance letter from Ferrandi – French Culinary School of the Arts – last week. I am thrilled! Classes will start in September and I am completely ready for a new, fresh start. I am also very ready to commit myself to this grueling profession because it brings me great joy. And no matter how hard something is, if you love it, it will always bring happiness. At least, that’s what they say…
Of course, with this acceptance letter and move comes the winds of change and all the baggage with it. I am trying my hardest to be graceful and compassionate. Change is not an easy thing, for everyone involved.
I’ve been reading a fellow Charlottesvillian’s blog – http://lilablog.com/ – she has many great insights into meditation and yoga practice. I’ve been going to yoga a lot lately and I feel much better for it. I really did miss yoga and must find a place to practice in Paris, or at least make a space in our future apartment where I can practice.
Frances’ blog has also inspired me to make soup tonight – Sweet and Spicy Spring Soup. Soup for the soul. Thank you, Franny, for the beautiful recipe!